Let My People "Go"

I did something rebellious this week.  I'm an American Christian and I shopped at Target!

I've been avoiding the whole "bathroom issue" on social media for as long as I possibly could. (Which, trust me, I'm usually the initiator of all things potty talk. This showed great restraint on my part.)

Then, this week, "the" letter from the White House was published and a whole new influx of ignorance exploded online.

Well, if the noisy minority gets to have their say, then I justly have equal rights to voice my common sense, er... opinion.

I'm obviously referring the issue of where transgender folk are allowed to pee. 

If I were reading that sentence from the eyes of any other generation, past or future, my first thought would be, "Is this what has come of the great America?! They've become so sparse on things to be offended by that they tried to take away a human's right to vacate their bowels and bladders?" 

And, yes. My past/future self would be correct. Apparently, that is what this nation has come to.

Well, I can sense that the imaginary blood pressure meter I've connected to this blog post is starting to rise through the roof. But, stick with me. I've suffered through your opinions for long enough. Take a quiet moment to sit through mine.

Here are some things to consider on this issue:

Everybody pees: The missed point of those opposing the right to choose which restroom one identifies with, is that the whole topic exists because people need to pee and poop. Whatever spin you're putting on this debate is simply spin. Any imagined fear over what else may possibly happening in public restrooms makes me wonder if you've ever set foot in one. Everybody poops. Everybody's got to do it somewhere.

That's not how bathrooms work: It seems that the women's room is the facility that is worrying protesters the most. As a woman who frequents a female potty multiple times daily, let me address this fear for those who have never had a peek in there.

To the men who stand at urinals, with their junk on display for all to see, know this: The women's room has nothing but stalls.

Here's an additional anatomy lesson for you: We have to sit down for anything we do in there. We don't have urinals. We don't see each others private parts. We're behind closed doors for the entire show. And, those doors even lock! This is why someone may feel safer in here. It's a private space. 

Something else to consider: Any new rules or regulations have not made your children "rapist bait" any more than they were before, because they aren't in there alone! Mothers don't allow that. Many mothers even have their sons in there because some men don't want to be bothered with that chore. If we want to start a protest, how about "Equal Shares of Diaper-Changing Duties Between Dads and Moms"? Because your toddler is crawling under my private stall.

How would you even know? Last I checked (yesterday) there was no bouncer at the women's room door. No one was signing in pee-ers by driver's license or birth certificate. And, I'm so thankful that no one was checking for proof of genitalia to register my toilet use. I had to go! I didn't have time any of that nonsense. And, you know what? I didn't even see another living soul in the 90 seconds it took to do my business. If I had, would I have even known their "true" gender? Probably not. They've been peeing somewhere for all these years and have succeeded at being discreet about it. 

Laws and written rules allowing fairness are not legalizing sexual assault: Let me now address those who swear up and down that they're not discriminating against transgenders, but against those who are pretending to be. 1.) Are you really? 2.) Because, that really doesn't seem to be the case. 3.) This is the strangest attempt at trying to sound politically correct I've ever come across.

Let's just call a spade a spade. You're uncomfortable with the idea of a human being "spayed". (Come on! At least give me credit for the pun!)

It's the twenty-first century and it's high time we stop being intimidated by everything that's different than yourself. So, you don't understand it? That's okay! I don't wholly either. I was born female and identify as female, so it's not a topic I've had to struggle through. You can either choose to educate yourself on the topic or choose to ignore it. But, what you can't do is take away the human rights of someone, just because you don't understand them or agree with their way of life.

Most crimes involving transgenders are ones where they are the victim. This is the issue at hand here. Allowing someone to relieve themselves in a safe and private environment. This does not make it legal for any man in a dress to army crawl underneath stalls peeking and touching at whatever he pleases. If someone really tries this, he will be kicked in the face by a high heeled shoe! Dumb move. Illegal move. He's going to jail.  

Maybe you're the perv: Who's dreaming up these scenarios, anyhow? And, aren't they kind of the perverts in this debate? The people who really scare me are the ones so vocal about who they think is in the next stall and what they think they're up to in there.

Why is your imagination going to such places? Are you having sex or doing questionable things in public bathrooms? If not, why do you assume that anyone else is? The only people I'm now worried about in the restroom, are the ones who are going to be taking it upon themselves to police the joint. I don't want anyone sizing me up and deciding whether they think I'm dainty enough to be a "real girl". I'm not the most delicate flower. Your assumptions may exclude me from using the women's room and I'm not okay with that.

This seems like a repeat of the homophobic rants I'd witnessed when gay marriage was the hot button topic of the day. "They're perverts!" "Do you realize what they do?" "It's disgusting!"

The simple answer to that is: Well, then, stop thinking about it so much!

For the record, I'm not picturing any of you in sexual scenarios with your spouses, boyfriends, girlfriends or lovers. So, why dwell so publicly on fantasies of what you think the people you're offended by are doing behind closed doors? That's between them, their partners and the Lord. 

You're not welcome into anyone else's bedroom or bathroom stall. When tempted to "preach" your opinions of others, take a moment to pause and focus on what the Bible preaches first: "...Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise." (Philippians 4:8)

God doesn't want us wasting so much time imagining what we think are the sins of sinners. Remember, "For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God." (Romans 3:23) We're all in the same boat. Do you want me dwelling on whatever I think you've been up to in your lifetime? Let's give each other a break and the benefit of the doubt. 

What Would Jesus Do? The most frightening part of this debate is the attempt to spin this into a Christian issue. Any church of any denomination trying to stir their congregation up into a frenzy over this has me in great fear over the reputation of all Christians. If you're a part of any religious ministry, you should already know this verse well: "For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." (2 Timothy 1:7)

Your responsibility is to teach, guide and encourage your flock. Not to rustle up fear and anger amongst them. Teaching the Word is a great responsibility and God is watching very closely the example you lay forth. "My brethren, let not many of you become teachers, knowing that we shall receive a stricter judgment." (James 3:1) And, speaking of judgement, we all know what the Bible says about that not being our job either. (Romans 14:13, Matthew 7:1-5, Luke 6:37, James 4:11-12... shall I go on?) 

We all can agree that indoor plumbing did not exist in biblical times. There's no mention of bathroom matters in the Bible, so don't pretend that this is a biblical topic. They had to go wherever they went back then and I can venture to guess that it was a lot less private than the stalls you're so worried about today.

What we do know, though, is how Jesus treated others. He asked us to show more love to others than we show for ourselves. We can't do this by inciting fear. We're not doing this by regulating others' bodily functions. We're not showing this when we're misrepresenting Christianity on social media and in our political discussions. America has guaranteed us our freedom of speech. Be cautious of how you use this right. If you're going to throw the Bible on a topic, be sure you're taking note of who's words you're quoting, their context, and who you're representing in your statements.

It breaks my heart that there are people who hate Christians, just because they have come into contact with someone who has been misrepresenting us. Don't form a belief just because a pastor or teacher told you it was the right one. Don't repeat an opinion if you're not truly convicted of it. Your church leaders aren't your only spiritual resource. Search Scripture on your own if something doesn't sound right. Go to the Lord yourself in prayer for guidance if you're unsure. All humans are flawed. Pastors make mistakes and speak out of turn sometimes too. Don't be a blind follower. Because, blind followers who are vocal become false prophets. 

Target is the Bomb: Let's face it. If Target was clubbing baby seals in their restrooms, I'd probably still shop there. It's the closest grocery store to my house and they have the lowest prices on dairy in town.

You can disagree with me. You can unfriend me on Facebook, unfollow me on Twitter, or gossip about me in the gender-assigned restroom of your choosing. But, please, do me a favor and save your breath with me on this topic.

Whatever you say, whoever you vote for and whatever on earth you choose to believe, you will never ever convince me to be afraid to pee. 

When God is Gross

Two weeks ago, as I was beginning my nephews' Bible lesson, the eight year-old was trying desperately to get me to skip the chapter on Abraham. He claimed that he and his brother had already read it during the week. I hardly believed him and presented the challenge that if he could tell me one thing about Abraham and what he had "read", we would skip that chapter and move on to the next. 

Older brother sweated nervously as his Sunday school fate lied in his baby brother's questionable sense of recall. You could practically hear the eight year-old's brain shuffle as it rolodexed through stored memory, grasping for any tidbit he could recall on Father Abraham. He gasped suddenly and answered, very matter-of-factly, "Abraham Lincoln freed all the slaves." 

Older brother then slapped his own forehead in disappointment and we retreated back to Genesis 12.

That week's lesson was just the introduction to Abram, Sarai, his promised legacy of becoming the "father of many nations" and ending with he and Lot's land dispute.

They had dodged a bullet for one week, but the next Sunday I was met with the same dread after we had finished up chapters on the destruction of Sodom, the dismissal of Hagar and Ishmael and the birth of Isaac.

I was beginning to understand the distress that had been plaguing the boys ever since I'd mentioned the "A" word. I then realized that they knew the story of Abraham's willingness to sacrifice Isaac was approaching. They had remembered something about Abraham from past lessons and suddenly I was being treated as if I were forcing them to watch a horror movie in Bible class.

This is probably the biggest struggle I face when taking on the role of these kids' spiritual advisor. Trying to teach them everything I can about God while they're still young enough that I can hold their interest. But, then coming to terms with the fact that, sometimes, the Bible is just pretty gross.

There's animal sacrifices all over the Old Testament, murder, rape, genocide, plagues, those sickos in Sodom who begged to molest a pair of angels, dogs eating Jezebel, demon possession, suicide, the cruelties and abuses that Jesus and the other martyrs faced and, let's see, the entire book of Revelations!

I grew up in church singing songs about "There's power in the blood" and "Nothing but the blood of Jesus...", chewing on unleavened bread that represented Jesus's flesh and drinking grape juice that represented His blood (eww, blood... more blood!) and constantly hearing about a lake of fire that all my unrepentant friends were on the verge of being tossed into. Often creeped out, tormented and lying awake at night dwelling on these things; but never brave enough to simply ask:

Why so much horror? Why all the blood?!

I recently asked the oldest living Christian I know this and explained how I come to dread teaching the kids these things when I know one of these difficult chapters is approaching.

I got the typical biblical answer of "Only blood can atone for sin." [Leviticus 17:11] That we all are sinners. [Romans 3:23] That we cannot be saved by works. [Ephesians 2:8-9] That our sins have earned us death and only through Jesus's perfect sacrifice can we be forgiven and see Heaven one day. [Romans 6:23, Hebrews 9:11-18] 

I knew this. I've heard all the same Sunday school answers my whole life... but what I really meant was why why?

Why blood? Why something so messy and revolting? What was God thinking?!

I prayed on this and what was pressed on my heart was a question of an answer:

Does it even matter why?

The Bible tells us that we're not supposed to understand everything while in our human minds on earth. [II Corinthians 4:18] Do we really need to? Does our faith have no value without complete comprehension of all things holy?

I know mine does! I may not have all the answers, but I can guarantee my faith is real. God has proven to me several times over His existence, that He is here for my benefit and I have seen His love and protection at work in my life. Constantly! I don't need the whys. I just need God! 

It's a "don't knock it 'til you've tried it" journey that no one can relate to unless they're willing to personally experience it on their own.

So, I've chosen to educate the kids in a very different manner than what I was presented with as a child. They have come to love God and Jesus outside of all the blood and Lake of Fire talk. They chose salvation and Christianity before they had even heard me utter the word "hell". (And, believe me, the first time I read a verse with that word in it, they covered their mouths and pointed at me as if I'd just cursed at them!)

I don't skirt the issues, but don't focus on them as a main ingredient to our beliefs. There's so much more that our faith has to offer. We won't understand all things while on earth. But, we will live a great life here with God as a part of it. That's the most important part of my faith to me. Not just dodging hellfire.

That said, I'm not for omitting Scripture that makes me uncomfortable either. It's all in there for some reason. Even if we don't yet understand why.

On a practical level, when a chapter on blood sacrifice comes up and is upsetting to the animal-loving kids, I remind them that in the biblical days, everyone slaughtered their own meat. Sacrifice wasn't a thing of gore like it is to our modern mindsets, but an act of giving away the purest of their goods to God. This wasn't just a blood sacrifice, but an act of offering back to God something that was true goods and currency in their day. On these lesson days, we are always sure to thank God that he chose for us to live in the days post Jesus's resurrection, relieving us of the bloody duty.

If you have any tips, guidance or funny stories about navigating the gory biblical stuff, please feel free to leave your comments in the designated field below. Teachers must always remain students if they're striving to be good ones. And, I know my readers and myself would love the additional insight.